Monday, June 7, 2010

Alas.

"I’ve
seen you with her before. You were standing on a street and sunlight was raining down. You smiled and put your arm around her, pecked her on the cheek as she wrapped her arm around your waist. Both of you looked at each other for just a brief moment before continuing your conversation with whoever that was. And even though neither of you said a word, a million things were conveyed, just in that split second.

I want that. I want the moment that both of you shared. But I don’t want it with just anyone. I want it with you and I know that it’s impossible but it just makes me want it even more.

I want to tell you without saying, that I enjoy your company. That I feel safe and at home whenever you hold my hand. That you are possibly the best thing that has happened to my world. With just a glance, I want to express how beautiful you make me feel. With just a pat on your arm, I want you to understand that I want to be there for you. And with just a squeeze of my hand, I want you to realise that I’m afraid of losing you.

But you don’t know. It just doesn’t happen for us. I smile at you, and you smile back, but you don’t hear me. I try to tell you that I want more, but two weeks later I am still just a friend. And even when I try to articulate this growing need, you don’t hear it, at least not the way I want you to.

So don’t take your arm off her shoulder, and don’t lean away when she wraps hers around you; at least not yet. You can’t hear me yet, but if you will, just wait awhile. You can’t hear me still, and maybe you never will, but if you could, please just hold on for a little longer. You might never hear me the way you heard her, but if you can hear me now, please hold on. I don’t know for how long, but I just don’t want this thing to end."

Reblogged (?) from Belinda.

Alas, they were my thoughts exactly.


But now?


I guess I've moved on already.